open ocean composition

sometimes worlds collide and there are things that cannot be understood. worlds collide and words become filters for days. the verbage is confused and the signals are crossed in choas, pulsed out coarse and raw like something outside of you, inside of you, trying to get back...outside. messages from an alien nation. to feel alien, to feel out of touch and so unsure of what you want. you want everything, and that's just it, you know very well that you can't have everything. you sit on a rock and think. you sit on a rock and think that perhaps nothing is how you see it. perhaps you see nothing. either way you accept things the way they are, or try to at least.

***

there is a shell riding on the back of a woman who was a tree. remember that story? remember the time? and so there is a shell here, as real as anything. you can feel there is a shell here, slung around the neck of everything wild and fiercely free. you hold your breath and your heart starts to go. you feel your heart go. it's in your chest wild and fiercely free. images come over your mind and you are kissing and being rushed up against and its hard to breath in such close quarters, and you're wondering what's happened to you. it breaks. your heart. sweat pouring like blood and you hear helicopters above you. it's a very anxious and acidic moment.